Are you serious?

Yes, I think this time I might actually be serious about this! I did so well yesterday (yes, I'm bragging) that I think I might truly be motivated to make this happen. Twelve weeks from now is the first full week in January. Wouldn't it be nice to have lost 20 pounds by then instead of wanting to? Yes, I think it would.

What was my motivation? Actually, it was someone I motivated a few years ago. What goes around comes around, huh? Long story short, I saw a picture of someone that I didn't even recognize because he'd lost so much weight. He did Body for Life just like Dana and I did and has kept the weight off for 2 years. He looks great! And I'm embarassed that my fat jeans are getting too tight. Something had to be done.

I also heard recently on TV that weight loss is attributed to 80% to what you eat and only 20% to how much you exercise. Now I know exercise is important, but I also know that when I was exercising and not losing weight, I wasn't following my diet 100%. More like 50% and that was on a good day.

I'm also keeping a food journal. Monday was a wash, but yesterday was GREAT!

Fat Grams: 4.5
Calories: 622

When I leave work today:
Fat Grams: 9
Calories: 752

Today is much different from yesterday; I brought a different variety of foods, but all are healthy. I exercised last night and Sunday. And I'm feeling so good about this. There's candy and Coke in the office and I haven't touched either. And you know that cold Coke in the refrigerator is calling my name!!

Hopefully, this one is for real!!

Here I go again on my own

Are you tired of this? I know I am. So tired of writing that I'm really going to do it this time, and caving days, or even hours later. Dana has a goal to lose 50 pounds by Christmas, and it seems up to me, at least partially, to make it happen. I'm responsible for what's in the house to eat, so it's up to me to step up.

Last week I taped 'Denise Austin' on ESPN. Yes, the shows are older than Cassidy, but here's what I know. The last time I lost nearly 40 pounds, it was in part due to Denise Austin. So I finally did one of the routines this morning. OMG am I ever out of shape. It's almost embarassing. No, it is embarassing. Not 5 minutes into it I was huffing and puffing.

I'm happy to say that I haven't put on any weight this summer, but I certainly haven't lost any. Actually, at one point I had lost a few pounds, but quickly put that back on.

We'll see how this time turns out.

YOGA

Yes, I did Yoga on Friday. Only 30 mintues of it. . . that's about all I could take. But I figured it was a start. Then I felt guilty and did the next day's routine. Because it was Memorial Day weekend, I knew I probably wouldn't be doing much more. And I didn't. Ate a lot of junk, but did sweat A LOT at the Indy 500. (Does that count?)

Back on track today. Core synergestics this morning and sweat my butt off. At least that's what I'm hoping for.

Today's menu:

• small bowl of Special K with skim milk
• rice cakes
• small salad, 1/2 chicken breast on 1 piece of wheat bread
• yogurt
• tuna casserole

I'm on a roll!!

Tuesday was not a good day as I spend the day in Logansport with my mom, uncle and aunt. They go every year and plant flowers at the graves of their parents, brother and grandparents. In addition to that, it's a day filled with eating. Happy Burger, the root beer stand and custard. So Tuesday was not a good day, although I did not have anything at the root beer stand.

I'm really enjoying exercising on my own. Well, not enjoying exactly, but I certainly do prefer it. And it's nothing against Dana, except for the fact that he's in a good mood even at 4:30 in the morning. I even did Ab Ripper today!! I am determined to lose this belly fat.

And I've done way better on my eating. Even though I worked my ass off the last round, I'm being much more mindful of my eating this round. I know, I'm only 4 days in, but you have to get disciplined from the start or it just doesn't work. They also say it's good to keep a food journal, so I'm going to start journaling here on occasion.

Today I've had:

• 1 egg, dry toast and a few cherry tomatoes
• Nutri-grain bar
• 1/2 fillet of talapia (broiled with lemon), long grain and wild rice and green beans
• 3-4 cups water

The rest of the day I have planned:

• banana and cottage cheese (although not together, one then the other)
• grilled chicken, pasta and vegetable (not sure what the veggie will be)
• snack in the evening

Actually, I think that snack in the evening needs to be cut back on or eliminated. I always tell myself that I'm hungry and eat it anyway.

I've realized in these few short days that I'm really not as hungry and I always claimed to be. Yesterday I didn't think I was going to make it through the afternoon, but held out and drank some water. Guess what!? My hunger went away, even though my co-worker made popcorn!

I also declined to go out to the warehouse today for an hourly employee's last day. He's retiring so they had cake. (WEAKNESS!!!) I decided that it would be best if I didn't go. I probably should have since I'm in HR, but I know I would have convinced myself that one tiny little piece of cake wouldn't hurt. I know that I have to stay disciplined these first few weeks and then it will be easier to say "No" to cake.

Week 1 - Round 2

Feeling the pressure of the Class of 89 reunion in 6 weeks. So, here I go again. I finally admitted to Dana that I would prefer to work out by myself. Surprisingly, he seemed OK with that. So I got up at 4:30 this morning.

P90X has 3 different sets of routines. Classic - Lean - Doubles. We did the Classic last time and I kept feeling like I needed more cardio. The Lean routine is more focused on cardio and for those that want to lose weight. So I am doing that set instead. It still incorporates weight training, but the focus is on cardio. You don't lose weight without cardio.

And I'm determined to be more focused on what I'm eating this time. So far today I've had:

• an omelet made with one whole egg and 2 egg whites, a piece of wheat toast (dry) and a few cherry tomatoes
• nutri grain bar
• cottage cheese, 1/2 cucumber and yogurt
• about 5 cups of water (I've been in the bathroom 3 times)

Surprisingly, I have not put on any weight since we finished our 12 weeks. I don't know how, but I'll take it. So my realistic goal for my reunion is 10 pounds. That would make me very happy!!

Have you called Jenny, yet?

No, but perhaps I should.

End of 12 weeks

Dana and I have come to the end of our 12-week journey. I was so excited when we started that I thought I would be posting some fabulous pics of myself in my bikini by this time. But, alas, weight loss has not been quite so attainable as it was a few years ago.

I have lost a grand total of 7 pounds. That's right!! Seven whole pounds!I had fully expected to have lost 15-20 pounds by Cassidy's birthday, which was last week. Very depressing.

So, I suppose I better re-think our strategy and gear up for the next 12 weeks. In 12 weeks, I have my 20-year class reunion. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm OK with the way I look and certainly wouldn't be embarassed to show up at my reunion. But that's just it. "I'm OK with the way I look." I don't want to keep telling myself that I look pretty good for a 38-year-old mother of 2. I'd prefer to look like an awesome for a 38-year-old mother of 2. I know, I've completely lost my mind.

I had a few things happen this weekend (don't even ask) that really depressed me and I'm determined to get some of this weight off. I'm also determined to wear a bikini on my vacation this year.

Wish me luck!

. . .positive attitude. . . positive attitude. . .